A Father's Role in Weddings: Outdated Habit or Lovely Tradition?

I read a great article recently by Rebecca Reid for metro.co.uk titled If He Asks Your Dad Before He Asks You, You Shouldn't Be Marrying Him. It's a fascinating perspective discussing the history of the tradition to ask a woman's father before proposing marriage and why it's outdated and sexist. I don't disagree that it is more than a little bit sexist, but let's face it, so much revolving around weddings are innately sexist at their core. 

My now-husband asked my father for my hand in marriage before he proposed. He even brought beer and hotdogs. Could this be the dowry of today? It's not exactly gold and sheep, but who needs those things anyway. I consider myself a feminist, but I didn't consider this at all degrading or sexist. I thought it was a sweet gesture that he took my father's feelings into consideration before he asked me to marry him. My father, on the other hand, asked my mom first and they've been married for 27 years. He did eventually ask her dad, but he proposed when he felt the time was right, not after a series of traditional steps.

My father also walked me down the aisle at my wedding and he even "gave me away." Had the choice been given to me, I probably would have preferred different wording, but I was ok with that too. I was happy to have the second most important man in my life escort me through the chapel, and I wanted acknowledgement of my parent's part in the wedding day. At this point in time I'm sure everyone knew that I was not being given away like a prize someone won at a carnival, but that it was merely the traditional words spoken at every wedding that no one has bothered to change yet.

Any more, fathers come in all different titles and genres. Father, step father, absentee father, grandfather who's like a father, even older brothers or uncles instead of fathers. Do you always have to ask the biological father or do you go for the most fatherly figure? What about mothers? Do they get a say in the matter? Does anyone get a say in the matter?

Should the bride's father be asked before the proposal? Should the bride's father "give her away?" 

It's a matter of personal opinion. Neither way is wrong and neither way is right. It all comes down to what makes you, your fiance, and your parents comfortable. Discuss with everyone before this is even an issue what their opinions are and why they feel that way, and let them know how you feel. If you think your father should be asked before you even consider saying yes, then inform your future fiance. If you think you should be the first know, inform your future fiance. It's all a matter of communication and being open and honest with each other. This way, no one is offended and no weddings are called off before they are even called "on."